You will always be criticized

In an effort to make a positive from a negative; lemonade from lemons, I write this. Recently I posted this message for my Galaxy Zento page of heroes that I write about and draw.

With your help and sharing, my project to inspire others with my Galaxy Zento project has been growing, slowly, but growing. I know it can grow more. The simple truth is, the more people who click like on Galaxy Zento, the more people it will reach. The more who share it with its message the more likely that will happen. I have a modest goal that I would like to reach by the end of next month. I would like the page to reach 1000 "likes". Can you help? Do you know anyone who loves original content, characters, and stories? How about practicing artists? Anyone who just wants to practice their art skills and get posted as a guest artist? As I'm preparing to post GZ Legends 50 (a milestone post!) I want to spread the word. I want people to know that you can still do what you love, or find something to love doing even with disabilities. You can still grow as a person. You can still inspire others. I will always support autism education and projects that help people grow as human beings. You can help me make this grow. What do you say folks? Its not enough that I share to you, when you share it reaches your people. So, give it a twitter and give it a share. Let others know that a guy with multiple conditions is striving to inspire. This week, I go to see my second oldest daughter graduate. So there will be some delays on other postings. A great time for your help. Love you all! Be blessed and inspired.


I also posted this:


So I posted a very special message on my wall. You know, growing up with Asperger's or any similar condition is not easy. I grew up with no support system because no one knew what was up with me. They didn't know what was "wrong" with me. Now that I grew up through that, I want to use any success I have to inspire others (especially my son as most you know, has Asperger's/autism). I want to give back for every step forward I make. So I hope you'll visit my page and check out what I'm doing. My goal is to get my project page Galaxy Zento and its heroes up to 1000 likes in the next month. You can have a livable life. You can do great things. It will get better. Let the inspiration carry on.

On the same day that I posted that second message I was accused of doing what I do, solely for personal gain. 

On that I will say that if personal gain was all I wanted, you wouldn't be able to go to the Galaxy Zento blogspot and read my stories for free (now up to part 49 of an ongoing story). I wouldn't bother scheduling to talk to college classes about what it's like to grow up with or have autism. I wouldn't bother. I wouldn't make videos, I wouldn't do anything but say "buy my book". That would be it and that would be all. No, I want all my success to do something more. Those who don't believe me will just have to wait and see. 

As you go forward in life, this is something you will have to remember to. Your best efforts, best intentions, and anything else you do will always be misunderstood or criticized by someone. Still, you must never give up. You must go on in spite of these people. Shut them out. One of these people will never have to be bothered by my posts again, because I blocked them. You don't have to block people, unless they are harassing you. But, you don't let them steer your life and ambitions. Don't let them mess with your goals because they don't understand you.

Look to history and see how many famous innovators ignored the criticisms and achieved great things for the world around them. 

Martin Luther King Jr. was told he couldn't do it.
Ghandi was told he couldn't do it.
Even Mother Theresa was told she couldn't do it. (Yes I know I'm not any of these people)

What do they have in common? None of them listened to the naysayers. Don't you listen to them either.

So what if my way involves selling some low cost books? Doesn't everyone have to do something in this world? Would I set a better example from my couch? 

I have yet to complain about my book sales, and I won't. The book is there and I would be stupid not to advertise it. I would be stupid not to try and take myself further in life. What kind of example would I set for my message if I did nothing? Writing a book was a great accomplishment for me and I refuse to let anyone come throw a big soggy blanket on it because I want to inspire others with my work. 

Also, I  never claimed to be some non-profit benefactor in this. I did say that I want to give back and that will continue to be my plan ever forward. As I said, those who don't believe me will just have to wait and see. They don't know me and their assumptions cast a shadow on them more than me.  That is how you must move forward too. 

So, want to write a book? Do it!
Want to ride a bike? Do it!
Want to take up golf? Do it!
Want to paint pictures? Do it!
Want to make videos about taking sledgehammers to wrecked cars? Well, yeah, do it!

And, if you do get paid for it, what would be wrong with that? I would call you lucky! Then, show others your success, especially if you have a disability! Let your accomplishment inspire others to live too! That's my goal!

Now.... what are you going to do?

Persevering with Disabilities Spotlight: Donna Bell

Living past disabilities takes guts. Today I am going to tell you about someone who must be some kind of commando on that point. Her name is Donna Bell of Louisiana. 

When Donna was 19 she was in a terrible car accident that sentenced her to life in a wheelchair without use of her arms or legs. She has no movement from the shoulders down. I'm sure there was a gut-tearing transitional period for her, but she's become something far more amazing. Look at this:

I love Groo the Wanderer and she did this picture with her mouth. That's right, her mouth. Now, I tried this. I put a pen in my teeth and tried to write my name. I won't even post the result. It was less than chicken scratch. Learning to do this is not easy by any frame of the imagination. I would have an easier time becoming left handed. And yes, I'm an artist. But you know what? She doesn't stop at drawing:

Yeah, crochet. She crochets with her teeth. I showed this to my wife who does crochet and she couldn't fathom it. But there it is and she's been recognized and seen in action by her town's media. Over the years, she's developed into an artistic dynamo and she's right here in Louisiana.

Okay, all that being said, it's time for the turn off section. This is the section where I tell you what's up and you say "oh not again" and walk away. But I challenge you  not to do that. These times of ours call for humanitarian efforts and the deserving should get the assistance. Some people just deserve to be rewarded in life. Yes there is a fundraiser. It's to get this awesome woman a wheelchair accessible van.

Still here? Good! I commend you. I know there are fundraisers a billion out there and we seen ten of them every day. Much as we would like to, we just can't help them all. That being said, I ask you to consider this being one of those times you pitch a five spot into the bucket to help someone deserving. Someone who's been a hero for themselves at the very least. She's never had a powered wheelchair even and look at all she's done. She deserves it people. Now, in order to put a face to the name and see the details, I have to give you a link to my friend Rodney Pike's page. He has even more details, more art and believe me; it's amazing.

LINK

And if you can do nothing else... SHARE THAT BLOG. Not this one, the one in the link! Come on folks, show some compassion for a fellow artist and someone who's not just crying and whining in life. She's a trooper and she deserves this! My man, Rodney can give you any other information you need.

Thank you for your consideration!

Why we need Autism Education more than ever

Do you call it "awareness"? Maybe you prefer "acceptance"? Whatever term you prefer to use, you're going to be close to the same mark. You can't have one without the other and you can't have any of it without education. This is more important now than it's ever been and that's not a issue that will decrease with time. I'm writing this to provide a list of reasons that prove what I'm saying. I'm even going out on a limb to say they're irrefutable. Let's see what  you think:

Because it's on the rise:  Right now the national averages put autism at 1-88 children. In some places it's more like 1-60, others it's 1-100, but 1-88 is the average ratio. That is an increase in cases from just 5 years ago when the average was 1-100 with the variation being more 80's to around 110. It's hard to say just how the new DSM is going to affect those numbers, but I don't see them dropping. Asperger's as a term may have been dropped, but it's being called simply "autism". That actually could raise the numbers even higher as the forms are lumped together and measured by severity instead of name. Further proof comes from a simple truth that supports the increase in numbers. It's a force of Nature because:

It's hereditary: Children with autism are growing into adults with autism. Just like I did, they are having children with autism. It's the cycle of life and nothing is likely to stop it anytime soon (save a planetary disaster). While all factors of this are in controversy, the hereditary nature is agreed upon. Check out this Wikipedia article. If you hate Wikipedia, maybe the Mayo Clinic is enough to convince you? As both point out, autism has a "strong hereditary factor". So, as long as people grow up and have kids who grow up and have kids, this won't be stopping anytime soon.

Because it's controversial: Autism brings controversy in ways never seen by a medical condition in history. It's the most controversial medical condition ever. You see it in commercials, talks online, in groups, and at gatherings. The autism community is split into factions as much as religion or politics with people who defend their beliefs with equal tenacity. Just look at all the fights over Autism Speaks. There are thousands of supporters to Autism Speaks and just as many who hate them. Someone who reads this will hate me just because I mention their name. Speaking of that, the division of the community is so bad that groups will resort to borderline racial slurs of each other. So autism, not only has it's own scale of belief systems but; for some, it's almost its own ethnic race. All of this goes to the level of picket lines and huge demonstrative gatherings for each side. If there's one thing that shouts for education to save the day, it's this! Further controversy goes into the fact that there are still hundreds of people out there who don't believe autism is even real. That includes some doctors.

Because kids go to school: IEP's are going to become even more common than before. Some public school systems complain that they are overrun with IEP issues. It gets worse because most states seem to think that this is the time to cut funding to schools across the nation. Thanks to population growth and the fact that autism is on the rise as documented, they couldn't make a worse decision if it involved drilling holes in their heads. Kids with autism have vastly differing needs. That means more IEP's. That means more costs. They need more funding, not less. So there's another entire group of people who apparently need educating (and they're supposed to be educating our kids).

Because autistic kids become autistic adults: In recent years a genius leap was made where people realized that kids actually grow up sometimes. That created a whole new scale of needs, support requirements and need of education on its own. Strides are being made forward, but more is still needed. As the autism community grows you can bet the need will.

Because of the Media: Let's face it, the media hasn't always been an ally to autism. Sometimes they fudge it up and wind up creating an image for autism that's completely off mark. Some small efforts have been made to change those mistakes, but they are small. I'm talking about the mention, clear at the end of a segment about Adam Lanza that pointed out; "people with autism are no more prone to violent crime than anyone else".  Yep, one whole sentence. I'm glad they said it. Still, keep the media properly educated takes a constant and diligent effort. Not only is there the news to deal with, but an explosion in "autistic" characters in television and movies. That means we have to work even harder to make sure people understand that we aren't all like Dr. House or Sherlock Holmes. We aren't all like Will Graham (of Hannibal) or the boy from Touch. While they're interesting characters, they don't hold a candle to what all of our community is like.

Because of insane costs: Families with autism still face way too many out of pocket expenses. Some of this comes from difficulty getting the professionals to see how much help is needed. Some of it comes from insurance companies not covering all facets of treatment. Insurance companies need education like anyone else, and it appears they still  haven't got it all. Google "autism costs" and get ready for a reality check. With numbers growing, you can bet costs won't be going down.

Because of social ignorance: Where couldn't I go with this? How about the shocking unemployment rate among autistic adults? The reports of difficulty getting halfway considered for jobs are out of this world. It's ridiculous. Good people are falling through the cracks of equal opportunity. Other disabilities still take a hit, but it's harder to prove with "invisible" conditions. Well, employers are in for a wake up call in coming generations, aren't they? Then we can look at bullying and abuse that still happen because it's chaos growing up with autism. It's all over the internet and national news somewhere every day.

Because of apathy in emergency services: Not just apathy, pure lack of education. While there are programs touring to help police, fire and ambulance work with people who have autism; they're going to have to up the ante. Where you once had one autistic child in a household, you now have a whole family on the spectrum. As long as there are people being beaten, pepper-sprayed, and tazed for little more than having a "quirk", education will be a top concern. Obviously, someone didn't know enough and a tragedy happened. People are dying from this.

Finally, autism isn't the only community growing by leaps and bounds with hereditary issues. Bipolar is keeping a steady pace. Mental illness is on the rise in our country and around the world at alarming rates every year. Along with that is an equal increase in discrimination and stigma. It's not a fun life for people with these conditions. For those who say "just lock up all the crazy people", they best be careful. One day that might just be everyone.

How does this comment on autism grab you?

First of all, credit to Cracked.com for all commentary I am about to quote from them. I'm a big fan of Cracked, so this is not a hate blog. Cracked has a solid reputation for putting real facts in their comedic writing. They have a knack for showing us how absurd the world really is when it comes right down to it. So, when I saw they had an article on some of the truths about guns, I had to read it. With issues of gun control in media hysterics, it's a perfect fit to the times.

5 Mind Blowing Facts Nobody Told You About Guns

That's so you can read the whole article at your leisure. And you should.

There's another fit to the times that I'm not sure they fully noted when they wrote the section I'm going to share with you today. I was reading through the section on mass shootings when one sentence brought the entire flow of the article to a screeching halt in my head. I literally had to stop reading right there and re-read the sentence again. Then I read it again. And I read it again. Then I re-read the whole paragraph. Then I finished reading the section and re-read the last two paragraphs. I actually had a hard time reading the rest of the article because I was so flummoxed in how this sentence read.

NOTE: I don't think this is what Cracked actually thinks of people with autism. My reading constipation comes from how the sentence makes its impact. The way it comes across leaves you wondering what they mean by the comment. It stands alone and its direction is unclear. If you, like many in the autism community, have been outraged by the idea that autism made Adam Lanza go on a killing spree; you'll understand why it could be such a raw nerve. That's why I think some expansion should go into the article on that.

So before I go any further, this is what I would like from you, dear reader. I would like to know how the content reads to you.  Here it is in it's full paragraph form:

"Let's play criminal profiler for a minute. Describe the next school shooter. We know he's out there; the stats prove that. We know he's a he. But we know more than that, right? If you pay attention to the news, this shouldn't be very difficult: These guys are all nerdy or autistic loners who get bullied at school and play violent video games at night until they can't tell the difference and finally lash out. The Columbine shooters are the poster boys: goth outsiders who even made a Doom mod to simulate the shooting. These kids get picked on and can't defend themselves, and they see guns as the only way to get even."

Now, the context is hard to grab until you get clear to the next paragraph where they share facts about the Columbine shooters you probably never knew. But nothing more is said to say that none of them were autistic. That comment floats unresolved forever. However, they do state there is "no typical school shooter profile", but you know how we like clarity and resolution. Check the next paragraph:

"Except it turns out that the Columbine shooters, Eric Harris and Dylan Klebold, weren't bullied and weren't "goth" loners. In fact, they boasted about bullying the "fags" in school themselves. They didn't target bullies or "jocks" who wronged them (the bombs were supposed to kill everyone, including their friends). It turns out that Eric Harris was simply a psychopath -- an intelligent, charming mass murderer like you've seen in a dozen bad serial killer movies. Dylan Klebold was just a depressed kid who went along with it -- so even the two people involved in the same shooting had totally different reasons for doing it."

So, while it specifies that these guys weren't bullied and thus resolves the idea of bullying as a cause, it doesn't do that for the mention of autism; one of the hottest nerves in the community today.

Let me repeat myself, that I don't feel it was their intention to slam autism in any way. I don't want people to plague the site with ugly comments (they get plenty of that and are quite used to it).  I want to know if I'm alone in how this hit me. How does it connect to you?  I do strongly recommend that you read the whole section to get a full feel for it before making any decision. In fact, I beg that you do so.

My autistic view of equality in marriage

Maybe that's all this is; my autistic view. Maybe it's just a rant. I've had my attempts at autism education viewed as rants before; not that it stopped me. Maybe there's a hundred ways to diminish what I'm about to say, to dismiss it, belittle it. Maybe this is a bad time for me to take a stand on what I see, but I've seen too much.

There's this red equal sign for marriage equality exploding across the internet right now. I've decided I finally have something to say about this. It's like this:

We need to stop putting our hatred into things like this and turn to actual and real problems.

I'm sure I just ticked off a lot of people by saying that, but you know what... it's true and I have the comparisons to prove it.

Are you worried about your children seeing gay couples who are married? How is that any different from just being a gay couple? It's really not. They were gay before they got married and will be afterward. If you are that worried about what your kids see out in the big bad world I have a novel idea for you: EDUCATE THEM. I know, Heaven forbid we actually talk to our kids.  Apparently it's a better idea to form picket lines at funerals of gay soldiers who died for your right to congregate on the matter in the first place.

Well, before you tell me the evils of being gay I want to know something. What do you think of prostitution, drugs, gangs, drunk driving, murder, national job loss, failing educational systems, and freaking starvation in our own streets?  Maybe I'm on another planet, but it seems to me (by raw statistics) that any of those does far more damage; destroys thousands more families, and (some) even kill thousands of kids every year. Just one of those examples causes way more destruction, financial damage, and heartache than all the gay couples of our nation put together.

Oh wait, maybe it's a religious issue. Well, besides the obvious issue of separation of church and state I'd like to ask you about The Ten Commandments. You know, the ten rules set by God that we are to follow at all costs? Again, I'll point you to my bolded question above to compare which issues are actually worse.

How about the Seven Deadly Sins? You know; LUST, GLUTTONY, GREED, SLOTH, ENVY, PRIDE, and WRATH?  Where in those is there anything remotely attributed to being gay? None. Zero. Zip. Oh sure you can tell me it's an unnatural thing and a "lust" of some form; but I'll trump that with prostitution that destroys families and involves gangs, drugs, guns and murder.

Better yet, if you want a real problem in the sanctity of marriage, why don't you try tackling the national DIVORCE RATE? You know, the one thing that breaks 50% of all marriages today. You know, where some of these same people stand in a church and swear an oath to each over before the Eyes of God?  You know, only to break those oaths within two years? If you really want to "preserve the sanctity of marriage" it seems to me that would be a better place to start.

So gay people want the right to get married. What does it say about us, that we will take up picket signs and congregate is mass groups in offense at this when there are 15 far deadlier snakes in our own back yards waiting to strike us? What do you think might happen if we put that much energy into just one of those other problems? I find it mind boggling.

Autism and Violence

In my last posting, I discussed the deadly crime of Adam Lanza. I discussed that having autism by itself does not indicate a tendency to become homicidal. Anyone who does become a murderer has a list of factors that led to their actions. That's not to condone those actions, rather to show that there is no single factor that makes one a homicidal maniac.

Today I want to talk about violence that does occur with autism and other inhibiting conditions similar to autism. Just like anything, there is a spectrum or scale of violent tendencies that can occur and they are not what you would normally expect.

Involuntary Stress Reactions: Consider a young man heavily affected by autism. He needs assistance in practically every facet of life. In each step of his day, a great deal of patience is required to work with him. If pressed too hard or if someone gets in a hurry, they risk a violent outburst. This could be flailing, kicking, biting, and even throwing things. It comes from severe difficulty relating to the world around them. This is a person who lives under constant stress in trying to function each day. He requires consistency in all things, from how he brushes his teeth to how he puts his shoes on. Everything has a delicate routine and he is so sensitive to it, that the slightest variation risks an overload to his stress limits and senses. With consistent therapy and support, some people's outbursts can be controlled. Some can even learn a limited sense of self control.

Why does this happen: Imagine all your senses and your limitations on stress at their near maximum just because you woke up today. You live on a proverbial balance beam where a hair out of place means a long fall. And that's what it feels like. I feels like your world just fell apart because someone move your alarm clock one inch out of place. That's giving you the most extreme possibility, but it does exist.

Involuntary stress reactions are not always violent either. What I am talking about is an automatic response to stressors, like tapping a nerve in your knee. It can be as simple as an odor that always makes you gag. You may not be able to control it without years of practice, if ever. When ever you come across that odor, you gag uncontrollably. Phobias are involuntary without treatment. It's an uncontrolled and severe fear. It's an uncontrolled response to that fear.

Young autistic children, even if high functioning, struggle in social development. This, as you might imagine, has to be very stressful. Our high functioning kids can learn not to be violent however and that is usually what is required. No, not all are violent. But it stands to reason that kids do go through phase where they will hit or kick other kids because they don't know how to react to the situation at hand. From what I have personally seen in autistic youth, it seems this phase can be drawn out.

Take a kindergartner who bites another student because he is angry. It could be for anything. They could have just bumped into each other. If this kindergartner has autism, that could be a sensory issue. He could have misunderstood and thought the other child did it on purpose. Maybe he reacts to being touched by surprise. Clearly, many factors could take place to the involuntary response. Regardless of them, it's a response from a sudden stress. In most cases, the behavior is correctable and treatable over time. This is involuntary because you combine a sudden stress with lack of developed impulse control.

This is the kind of violence that can be found in autism. It is not calculated or homicidal. It's not meant to be cruel either. It's nothing more than an automatic response to stress. So, when someone wants to talk about violence and autism in the media; it's time to get more of an education on just what kind of violence really happens in autism alone. Autism, by itself, is not a contributor to homicidal or psychopathic tendencies.

Connecticut school shooting and autism?

On Friday, December 14th, 2012, in Newton, Connecticut, Adam Lanza embarked on a mission of death and destruction. He took two 9mm handguns and shot his mother to death. That wasn't enough for him as he took those guns to Sandy Hook Elementary and opened fire in two classrooms. 20 children of ages 5-10 and 6 adults lost their lives.

The media calls this the second worst shooting of it's kind due to the death toll. I say it is the absolute worst of its kind due to its depth of depravity. Historically school shootings have taken the lives of adults. Horrifically, Adam Lanza chose to kill small children.

I am personally horrified at what has happened and my heart goes out to all the families who have suffered such a terrible loss. It's the worst loss any parent could suffer.

But what about the report that Adam had autism? If you read this Huffington Post article, you'll note that there are many discrepancies being mentioned. Just compare to this AP article (sorry I lost the link and now cannot find it, but you really should google search and compare for yourself).

-Huffington reports that he may have autism OR a personality disorder. This tells me that no one knows what he had or how. This is very important! When the media reports that some spree killer gunman was autistic, they create stigma among the uneducated that hurts the autism community.

-Reports on the guns being properly registered is also debated. Some sources say they weren't and at least one says they were. Not that it matters how they were registered at the bottom line. Adam clearly would have used them either way.

-Reports that his mother worked for the school are debated. Apparently there is report that no one at the school knew who she was.

Obviously, the media is not the best source to learn about autism. And I'll say this too: autism does not mean homicidal. Honestly, anyone can become homicidal and there are a wide variety of factors that add together to explain why. Until the media can get the story absolutely straight, we aren't going to know why he did what he did. There's only one thing that matters; what he did was heinous and an act of despicable terror. We need to remember this.

Again, my heart goes out to the families. My own youngest is 10 and I know all of you parents out there share the sentiment. Adam Lanza, for what ever he was dealing with, decided to become a killer. Now there are so many young minds scarred from his final acts in life. I hope they concentrate on the lives and minds of those poor kids. I also hope they eventually get the story straight.