Send this autistic 10 year old to meet Stan Lee

Happy with just cardboard

UPDATE: THE AMOUNT HAS BEEN COLLECTED! READ UPDATE BELOW FOR MORE INFORMATION!

At this point the project is still on: Stan Lee is still scheduled for New Orleans.

I know, I was going to start posting the memoirs but something far far more important has surfaced.  I'm hoping that some of you out there are willing to do something to help out.

Many of you who read my work regularly, know that my son and I have a high functioning form of autism.  Though I went through life undiagnosed and through chaos, I'm doing all I can to make sure that my son doesn't have the same hard time.

So far that has been fairly successful. He has a great team of teachers and doctors, but he's had a hard time lately. Big changes have hit his life and he's struggling with them. It is now believed that he has to learn how to control child bipolar on top of autism. Yes, it is more than possible to have both.

Note the arches!

Now he internalizes his struggles and gets angry with himself. He puts himself down, slaps and hits himself and we are scurrying to check med changes and help him any way we can. He has been on the gluten free diet for over a month now. He hates it however because he can't have what his friends get in their school lunches. This 10 year old boy, at such a crucial time in his life, needs a morale boost. It's one thing to tell him about the successes of others out there, but if he could meet his hero, Stan Lee, I think it might just set him on a much better track. He would see that good things do happen. He would see that he is worthy of those things. That's not to say we don't tell him he's worthy every day, because we do.

Stan Lee's name gets real excitement out of my son. For a school project in 3rd grade, he played the part of Stan Lee for his class's "living wax museum". In this he would stand in front of his desk and people would come and poke his shoulder. Then he would recite some of Stan Lee's biography. He hates being poked, people.  But he did it for Stan Lee.

Now we live in Monroe, Louisiana and Stan Lee is going to be at the New Orleans Comicon in November. That creates a once in a lifetime chance to take my son to meet his favorite celebrity Stan Lee right here in the same state we live in. But we need help to make it happen.

I also know that Stan Lee loves to help out young artists. He could to that in this case with a handshake and my kiddo is a very talented little visionary. See that picture up above? He was in 2nd grade when he did that with just cardboard. He still builds things out of his room that are mind boggling. Stan Lee knows heroes better than anyone. Well, this is about my little hero!

Just to show that I'm willing to make my own sacrifices I'm doing auctions  now too like THIS.

So how can you help?   You could start here:

DONATION BUTTON REMOVED: AMOUNT NEEDED HAS BEEN COLLECTED, THANK YOU ALL FOR THIS INCREDIBLE BLESSING!

Or you can order artwork from my Cafepress store or my DeviantArt page. We won't get much from the sales but every little bit will help and you'll have something nice to show for it.

This is totally for my son. If you have any questions, please feel free to email them to thewildeman2@yahoo.com.    Bless you for even considering aiding this project. I don't know how else to show he really is deserving.   OOPS... here is the cost breakdown of making this work. The target number we are trying to hit is 435.00.   Yep, just 435. Well, it's not such a small amount when you see the breakdown. That cost covers the following:

Convention tickets for Denver and one adult (can't send a 10 year old autistic in by himself after all) and that's tickets at the door. Not ordered ahead of time. So 140 dollars.

Gas estimated at 80 dollars.

Hotel stay of 180 dollars.

And with Stan Lee.... his autograph is 55 dollars and a photo with him is 80 dollars.

So what we are asking help with only covers getting kiddo that autograph and photo... it gets one adult and him through the door and into line. If either of us adults wants more that is our responsibility.

Now if you want to send him to the con with anything extra for his own use, you may specify and arrangements are completely open.  If we can just cover that 435, it would be a massive door opener and get him to meet his hero.   You can visit the New Orleans Comicon website HERE.

A lot more on why he's worthy HERE.

VERY IMPORTANT UPDATE As of 9-20-2012! Please read!:  Today we took Denver to the hospital program. The average staying time for the program is 7-10 days. That's really awesome news and I hope that's how this lands. The offer quite a bit out out patient programs as well and I think we will want to be involved in those. So the project can totally go forward. There's even more reason now than ever. When we are in that line and I get him to meet Stan Lee, I intend to tell Denver to remember it because awesome things can and do happen. END UPDATE

UPDATE: 10 dollar donation received 9-3-2012
UPDATE: 55 received 9-4-12 THANK YOU BOTH!!
UPDATE:  A very cool person shared this to Stan Lee's Facebook page. Very cool, you know who you are and we thank you!
UPDATE: 7.77 donation received 9-11-12 THANK YOU!
UPDATE:  9.89 donation received 9-12-12 THANK YOU!
UPDATE:  25.00 donation received 9-12-12 THANK YOU!
UPDATE: 9.12 donation received 9-13-12 THANK YOU!
UPDATE:   9-14-12... another awesome person has contacted me and made many awesome suggestions as well as (this person) is actually going to bat and contacting people of the Convention itself. You know who you are and we thank you! We're blown away.
UPDATE: 10 dollar donation received 9-14-12 THANK YOU!
UPDATE:   25 dollar donation received 9-17-12 THANK YOU!
UPDATE:  25 dollar donation received 9-20-12 THANK YOU!
UPDATE:    5 dollar donation received 9-24-12 THANK YOU!
UPDATE:    5 dollar donation received  9-28-12 THANK YOU!
UPDATE:   25 dollar donation received 9-29-12 THANK YOU!
UPDATE:      75 dollar donation received  THANK YOU!!!!
UPDATE:   20 dollar donation received THANK YOU!!
UPDATE: 2 more donations in so THANK YOU! and that's as of 10-4-12
UPDATE: Another donation received from a person who's really going to bat so GREAT BIG THANKS, you know who you are! That 5% charge from Paypal is vexing but please don't worry about it. This is going very well!
UPDATE: A new donation breaks the 300 mark!
UPDATE! THE ENTIRE AMOUNT HAS NOW BEEN COLLECTED!!!! THANK YOU ALL YOU WONDERFUL AND SUPPORTIVE PEOPLE OUT THERE! I'M ETERNALLY GRATEFUL!  THERE WILL BE PHOTOS AND ALL SORTS OF AWESOMENESS!!! THE DONATION BUTTON WILL REMAIN OPEN UNTIL THE WEEK BEFORE WE LEAVE. IF YOU WANT TO CONTRIBUTE JUST TO HIS TIME AT THE CON YOU MAY.

After "Raised in Hell"

A lot of people have seen my first book that has gone to thousands of families for free. The book leaves off at a point where I get on a Greyhound bus in Barstow, California headed for Salt Lake City.

What's the big idea about that? The premise of the book is my growing up undiagnosed (autism and bi-polar disorder) through a chaotic childhood. It was my experiences growing up in an age and location where they just weren't diagnosing my age group for those things. Even though they sent me to a hospital at age 12/13, my diagnosis remained "guarded" for the full scale of it.

In Raised in Hell, I survived a chaotic life that involved:

-living in foster homes (some abusive) during my parents divorce (approx age 4)

-living with an abusive (drunk and drugged) step parent until I ran away from home at 14 (started age 6)

-having self abusive seizure like episodes that I am now medicated for (from age 6 on)

-surviving violent bullying from grade 5 until I left home at age 14 (due to moving this involved several different schools)

-never understanding myself as a person

If you want to catch up before I go on, you can download my book here for free:  LINK

Just scroll down the page until you see the title and the word "download". It is SAFE. You will get a simple PDF.

From this edition forward, my blog will take you into the memoirs of what happened after I got on that bus and headed to Salt Lake City, where I believed I was going to be picked up by an adult who knew me. Well, I can tell you I wasn't picked up by anyone when I got off that bus, but that's for next time.

So I hope you will follow along in the continuation of my story as I moved into a stage of life where I had to learn to fend for myself.  That would be from late age 16 into my adult years, still unaware of my medical conditions and still misjudged for them. Still a shining example of why diagnosis, care and support are important. Remember, I wasn't diagnosed until around 2005-2006 after my son was diagnosed at age 3.

Until then, support each over and be good to yourselves.

Autism designs for you

As many of you know, I have a Cafe Press page and I mostly do my characters and fantasy artwork on it. I also do anti-bullying and autism awareness pieces. Well, I've done one anti-bullying piece and now three autism awareness pieces, but there will be more. There will be more especially for the autism pieces.

I'm not doing them to collect donations, they are just for you to enjoy for your own purpose of raising autism awareness. For these designs you can get everything from T-shirts to keychains. From mouse pads, to greeting cards.

As for the T-shirts, I bought one myself of my top hero, King Falcon. It's a well made shirt and best washed and then lightly tumbled dry or air dried (hang it up). Anyway, let me introduce you to my autism art pieces and I hope you'll consider them for your use in autism awareness.  I can also make a design for you to take to a screenprinter yourself for 30 dollars.  Not to worry, you can get some very good design out of me for that. I can also design your tattoo for the same amount.

Autism Heart

Autism Heart:  This is a small piece I made with an older digital program. It doesn't increase in size well, so I only put it on things that work well with small images. This makes a great keychain, and comes in pocket size on T-shirts. While this image isn't on a lot of stuff it works exceptional on Cafe Press's little stuffed animals. Take a look!

Autism Strong

Autism Strong: Available on a few more items than the first heart, this piece sends a clear message that we can be strong. You can even get this on a keychain or waterbottle. I only selected a few shirts, so if you want a style and don't see it, let me know and I'll make changes so you can get it!

Autism Heart and Key

Autism Heart and Key: This object comes on the most stuff yet as it's got the best resolution of any autism piece I've made yet too! You have to browse this one to believe it! You can even get this one for your electronics like ipads and ipods, whatever you've got! Nook and Kindle sleeves too! It's a simple design so it works on nearly everything.

If you want to see all the pictures available here is the link for the store front of Galaxy Zento on Cafe Press.

I hope you enjoy your tour and will consider my designs for your awareness efforts. Thanks for all your support!

Handling phobias and fear in autism

Giant Cicada Killer wasp: Harmless to humans

This morning I checked my messages to find a question from Jill on Autism and Phobias that read:

I also came across your posting after googling autism phobias. My son recently developed a debilitating fear of bees and dragonflies. I'd be interested to hear what you were able to do to help your child deal with his flying bug phobia. Right now we are not able to spend time outside. As soon as he sees a flying insect he starts screaming uncontrollably. Thank you for sharing your experience with this!


Well, Jill, this post is for your and anyone else wondering that same question.


The ultimate answer to a phobia is intensive therapy, but there are steps to take before going that route.


The first steps I like to take, and they seem to help, is education. My 10 year old son is also afraid of just about any flying insect that he can see. He worries that they all are bees or specifically the Mahogany wasps we have in this area. 


I think the first thing that gets them is that these are speeding objects that are hard to identify and can't be controlled. This sets off a sensory and startle reaction. Once that happens it's a chain reaction the rest of the way and hard to reverse. He will need a great deal of reassurance and comforting. Reassurance that these insects aren't looking for him. And that's where education of these things comes in.

Green Dragonfly: Harmless to humans

There are children's level books on just about every bug you can think of at any library. Get your hands on some and let your child know you would like to teach him with some pictures about the bugs in your own backyard or at the park. If there's resistance, get him to agree that pictures can't hurt and then start teaching him about them. 


Next step, check Toys R Us for bug toys that he can handle and touch. He may balk but show him that it's just rubber and not real. With things like dragonflies it's safer than with things you don't want him to touch, like spiders. 


Make it a game. See how many bugs he can identify as they fly around and tell you about them.


Through is all, it will take time, constant reassurance, patience, support and a loving attitude. With enough of that, he can start to grow out of his fears. 


Similar steps can be used for fear of sounds, like thunder. Teach about it, make it a game, and use lots of hugging and supporting. And he will want to retreat, the first odd number of times, it will be hard to get him to do it. You must not give up. Our kids take a very long time to make changes. If in doubt and absolutely unsure, consult a specialist.

Setting an example for our autism youth

My desk area for Galaxy Zento

You might remember, a couple blog posts back, where I wrote to you all about my Galaxy Zento project and what you could do to help with the setting of that example. Well, you worked wonders, my friends and tripled the number of people I was reaching. That's not a million people or anything, but it was a record and I'm grateful. The record? 676 people reached. That's more than 5x the number of LIKES on the page. Thank you!

So today I want to share more about my experience growing up and my son's experience in comparison with autism. I want my experiences to give hope to families struggling with understanding their kids and hope to kids who aren't sure where their lives are going.

This is NOT to say that I have the final answers to anything in autism. It's not meant to give false hopes to anyone. But if you have no hope to draw on at all, where does that leave you?

When I was growing up I was considered to be one effed up kid and that's just the language that got used. During the divorce of my parents I vanished into a fantasy world tried to get others to believe that I had bionics like the Six Million Dollar Man. Today, my son is trying very hard to convince us that he's a star in outer space with super powers. The fantasy is still there.

My son and I collect together

I developed rituals before I was ten of doing things in even numbers. I had to turn lightswitches off or on twice, zip zippers twice, turn objects twice and so on. I felt severely compelled to do this and I don't remember thinking there would be anything but bad luck if I didn't.  I developed a stim of clearing my throat, just like my son does today. I had other stims too and sensory issues. I liked the feeling of some fabrics under my fingernails and cool surfaces were calming to me.

I developed trouble in school early. In my last article I explained that my son has gone through a spot of bad behavior, stealing back his DS when grounded and sneaking out of the house at night through a window with a six foot drop. Well. When I was 8 or 9, I was told to stay after school. I knew I would be in trouble at home if I were late and I told the teacher my father needed to be called. She said it was my problem. I asked to go to the bathroom. She let me and I snuck out of school and ran home. I destroyed letters I was supposed to deliver to my father from the teachers before that (only two days before) and had to stay after again. This time she said I was NOT going to the bathroom. However she left the room,  summoned by the principal and I was gone.

When the phone call came, I got the most horrifying belt beating you can imagine and sentenced to my bed for thirty days. I was to come home, do my homework on my bed, eat dinner on my bed and I could only leave my bed to go to school or the bathroom. I could have one stuffed toy. My father let me out of that punishment after a week. He didn't think I could handle the whole thing, but I never, ever did that again. I won't punish my son like that, but he is in a lot of trouble right now. The difference is I have a team of people to work with him and explain things and teach him. All the while he still gets disciplined. The point is, I had my behavior rough spots too. I had my ticks, my stims, and all the things I see in him today.

By the time I reached 6th grade, I had very few friends (there were 3 of us) and two of us were bully magnets. Before I went to Jr High (a total freaking nightmare) I was playing with kids 5 years younger than me. Just like my son prefers to play with kids either way younger or almost adults (sound familiar?). I didn't understand kids my age at all. It was a concern but not addressed very well, so continued. Those were the times. Now I'm hoping to keep him from being bullied like I was.

A painting I did for autism

Despite my life and all I went through, despite not having support for autism as kid; despite running away from home at 14; despite my random life that I will be sharing here soon; despite the fact that my medical health has gained deteriorating factors, I am still doing things. I still became a parent of four kids, I still have a part in their lives, I still held jobs, and now I'm still striving to do something, anything. I want kids with autism (who are unsure of their lives) and kids with bipolar or who are being bullied, to know that they can do something too. That is what Galaxy Zento stands as an example of.

You can do this too. You can take the accomplishments of your life and show them to your kids. Show them that it's not over until it's over and life has possibilities for them. Show them other people who do amazing things despite disability. It's not about being gainfully employed either, it's just about doing something that you can be good at. And that's a great start!

So thank you for sharing Galaxy Zento. I hope more of you will continue to "like" and follow the page. And when the first novel (The Chessmen) gets published, you'll hear about it first. Thank you!

Even I can stumble in autism parenting

My kiddo when he was doing homework

Raising a child with autism is a series of challenges. Parents get flustered and we are no exception. Yes, I've been an advocate for education on autism but that doesn't make me more than human or immune to stress and frustration.

It's easier to give advice on someone else's child because you can almost do it with a clearer head and a different point of view. But that's why we have a community isn't it? So let me bring up to date.

Last week my son was grounded from his DS games for three days because of lying. He accepted that up front but got up in the middle of the night and stole his DS back from our bedroom. For that, he lost it until the 1st of July (with a vacation right around the corner). I warned him if he did that again, he couldn't take his DS on vacation. We spent the day talking about it and doing what is right. That very night, he stole it again.

I hid the DS in a new place that truly confounded him. We woke up at 2 am with him in our closet looking for it.

To stop that behavior we removed the DS from the house, but a new situation came up. It was 10:30 or so at night and we were in the opposite end of the house watching television when I got a phone call. It was the stepfather of one of my son's friends (not keep in mind my son's 10 years old). My son was standing in his friend's driveway on the opposite side of the block from us. I couldn't believe it. I went straight to his room and sure enough, he wasn't there. He had climbed out his bedroom window and left. We didn't hear a thing and no one saw anything either. I went and picked him up.

How did he manage a window with a six foot drop? His bed was how he reached the window and pushed out the screen. My mountain bike was parked under the outside of the window and that's how he got down. He was lucky, way too lucky to describe. The following morning we went into protocol mode. Call the therapists office and report to his psych dr, get his counselor and a police officer to come over and talk to him about how dangerous it was for a child in his pajamas to run off at night.

He hasn't run off again, but he's still getting up at night and getting into mischief. He snuck his laptop into his room and has gotten candy. The candy is no big deal but we are worried for his safety so there are rounds of us playing guard duty. His bedroom has been completely rearranged so there's no more reaching that window. I need to be taking his shoes and sandals at night. And I've set up a table in the living room so I can be right in sight of him while working at my computer instead of being in the office.

We've already received lots of wonderful advice. Good friend Neil from facebook suggested that his DS may have become his special interest and therefore as powerful as a stim behavior for him. Taking it away makes him too unbalanced. I missed that thought and thank Neil for pointing it out. So a new schedule is under way. He's saying he needs more of us. He's not throwing violent tantrums or anything like that.

But even an advocate can get flustered and need advice. No one is perfect.

To all my Autism Friends and Family

Just because you have autism or a debilitating disorder, doesn't mean you can't leave your mark on this world.

I plan to be a living example of what I just wrote above this line and I'm asking for your support in doing so. NOT monetary support, so just put that out of your mind. I'm asking for moral support in another fashion that won't cost you a thing. I'm asking for a show of numbers. Let me explain.

As some of you know, I have moved on to another project called Galaxy Zento. It is my universe of heroes, villains, fantasy and sci fi and has it's own blog (linked to the name). This universe is how I survived some of my childhood.  I want you to remember that this is the work of a man with increasing health difficulties, disability (autism, brain injury and possibly MS or related). On top of that I want you to remember that this is a man not giving up. So let my example be your example. I want to share that with you.

You are the best of readers and I have enjoyed your support in my autism writings since I started in around 2008. The works of this blog will remain online until the internet ceases to exist (or blogspot does and I hope that never happens). We have shared so much in the world of autism. We've laughed and cried and my work has actually helped a few people here and there. I do hope it helped way more than that. So here is how you can help me with my project.

1: If you have been a "follower" of this blog, please do so on the Galaxy Zento blog too. Even if you never go back to it, it shows support. I really hope you do come back and enjoy the stories I'm writing there, but just the fact that followers show is wonderful and I will be grateful to you for that.

2: Share it! If you like what you read or know someone who likes to read online, share my work where ever you want to! So long as there is a link and I'm posted as the owner, you can even print and share (not sell).  Share anywhere you like and go, Facebook, Twitter, Reddit, Stumbleupon, whatever!

3: Comment! I would very much enjoy to see comments from anyone. You can post anonymously or sign in and your email will not be spammed (I've checked on that with Blogspot). I will not use your email for anything at all. I would just love to get the interaction. The items above are more important, but this would be very cool to see.

4: If you are on Facebook, come to the Galaxy Zento fan page and click LIKE. That will also NOT spam you and shows your support. Feel free to browse the more than 200 illustrations I have drawn so far (and more to come before I lose any more use of my hands). I hope you will visit there often too. The more "likes" the better. Naturally, as above, comments and all sorts of picture likes are very welcome!  And again, share the same way if you would. On the fanpage there will be updates to all sorts of things Galaxy Zento, that includes the book work and more art.

Now, if you want to, and you see something of my art that you really really like or want to show off Galaxy Zento in other ways, that's where you could make purchases if you want to. I do NOT expect you to. But it is available and I have done Autism art as well. The autism art and T-shirts are available on my CafePress page. Kids sizes are there too. If you want a mug or mouse pad compare prices with my DeviantArt page before you buy. I don't get much out of any sales. I get 2 bucks if you buy a mousepad at DeviantArt for example. But you could get something to show off and enjoy.

Sorry, no T-shirts on DeviantArt.  I will take Autism art requests and make them available!

 My stance will always be for autism education. Want to know who I think you should donate to on autism?   Easter Seals and your local Autism Society chapter, that's who.  If you are in another country and have a group that's helping your community (that's legally recognized and legitimate for taking donations) go with them.

So, what I'm asking to recap is for follows and likes on the blog and facebook and sharing. Commets and interaction would also be nice. So there you have it. I will be passing this around to my friends of autism on facebook and email and I hope you will consider it. Let my example be yours. And know that no one with autism is alone. You are not alone. Thanks and I hope you enjoy what you see!