Autism designs for you

As many of you know, I have a Cafe Press page and I mostly do my characters and fantasy artwork on it. I also do anti-bullying and autism awareness pieces. Well, I've done one anti-bullying piece and now three autism awareness pieces, but there will be more. There will be more especially for the autism pieces.

I'm not doing them to collect donations, they are just for you to enjoy for your own purpose of raising autism awareness. For these designs you can get everything from T-shirts to keychains. From mouse pads, to greeting cards.

As for the T-shirts, I bought one myself of my top hero, King Falcon. It's a well made shirt and best washed and then lightly tumbled dry or air dried (hang it up). Anyway, let me introduce you to my autism art pieces and I hope you'll consider them for your use in autism awareness.  I can also make a design for you to take to a screenprinter yourself for 30 dollars.  Not to worry, you can get some very good design out of me for that. I can also design your tattoo for the same amount.

Autism Heart

Autism Heart:  This is a small piece I made with an older digital program. It doesn't increase in size well, so I only put it on things that work well with small images. This makes a great keychain, and comes in pocket size on T-shirts. While this image isn't on a lot of stuff it works exceptional on Cafe Press's little stuffed animals. Take a look!

Autism Strong

Autism Strong: Available on a few more items than the first heart, this piece sends a clear message that we can be strong. You can even get this on a keychain or waterbottle. I only selected a few shirts, so if you want a style and don't see it, let me know and I'll make changes so you can get it!

Autism Heart and Key

Autism Heart and Key: This object comes on the most stuff yet as it's got the best resolution of any autism piece I've made yet too! You have to browse this one to believe it! You can even get this one for your electronics like ipads and ipods, whatever you've got! Nook and Kindle sleeves too! It's a simple design so it works on nearly everything.

If you want to see all the pictures available here is the link for the store front of Galaxy Zento on Cafe Press.

I hope you enjoy your tour and will consider my designs for your awareness efforts. Thanks for all your support!

Handling phobias and fear in autism

Giant Cicada Killer wasp: Harmless to humans

This morning I checked my messages to find a question from Jill on Autism and Phobias that read:

I also came across your posting after googling autism phobias. My son recently developed a debilitating fear of bees and dragonflies. I'd be interested to hear what you were able to do to help your child deal with his flying bug phobia. Right now we are not able to spend time outside. As soon as he sees a flying insect he starts screaming uncontrollably. Thank you for sharing your experience with this!


Well, Jill, this post is for your and anyone else wondering that same question.


The ultimate answer to a phobia is intensive therapy, but there are steps to take before going that route.


The first steps I like to take, and they seem to help, is education. My 10 year old son is also afraid of just about any flying insect that he can see. He worries that they all are bees or specifically the Mahogany wasps we have in this area. 


I think the first thing that gets them is that these are speeding objects that are hard to identify and can't be controlled. This sets off a sensory and startle reaction. Once that happens it's a chain reaction the rest of the way and hard to reverse. He will need a great deal of reassurance and comforting. Reassurance that these insects aren't looking for him. And that's where education of these things comes in.

Green Dragonfly: Harmless to humans

There are children's level books on just about every bug you can think of at any library. Get your hands on some and let your child know you would like to teach him with some pictures about the bugs in your own backyard or at the park. If there's resistance, get him to agree that pictures can't hurt and then start teaching him about them. 


Next step, check Toys R Us for bug toys that he can handle and touch. He may balk but show him that it's just rubber and not real. With things like dragonflies it's safer than with things you don't want him to touch, like spiders. 


Make it a game. See how many bugs he can identify as they fly around and tell you about them.


Through is all, it will take time, constant reassurance, patience, support and a loving attitude. With enough of that, he can start to grow out of his fears. 


Similar steps can be used for fear of sounds, like thunder. Teach about it, make it a game, and use lots of hugging and supporting. And he will want to retreat, the first odd number of times, it will be hard to get him to do it. You must not give up. Our kids take a very long time to make changes. If in doubt and absolutely unsure, consult a specialist.

Setting an example for our autism youth

My desk area for Galaxy Zento

You might remember, a couple blog posts back, where I wrote to you all about my Galaxy Zento project and what you could do to help with the setting of that example. Well, you worked wonders, my friends and tripled the number of people I was reaching. That's not a million people or anything, but it was a record and I'm grateful. The record? 676 people reached. That's more than 5x the number of LIKES on the page. Thank you!

So today I want to share more about my experience growing up and my son's experience in comparison with autism. I want my experiences to give hope to families struggling with understanding their kids and hope to kids who aren't sure where their lives are going.

This is NOT to say that I have the final answers to anything in autism. It's not meant to give false hopes to anyone. But if you have no hope to draw on at all, where does that leave you?

When I was growing up I was considered to be one effed up kid and that's just the language that got used. During the divorce of my parents I vanished into a fantasy world tried to get others to believe that I had bionics like the Six Million Dollar Man. Today, my son is trying very hard to convince us that he's a star in outer space with super powers. The fantasy is still there.

My son and I collect together

I developed rituals before I was ten of doing things in even numbers. I had to turn lightswitches off or on twice, zip zippers twice, turn objects twice and so on. I felt severely compelled to do this and I don't remember thinking there would be anything but bad luck if I didn't.  I developed a stim of clearing my throat, just like my son does today. I had other stims too and sensory issues. I liked the feeling of some fabrics under my fingernails and cool surfaces were calming to me.

I developed trouble in school early. In my last article I explained that my son has gone through a spot of bad behavior, stealing back his DS when grounded and sneaking out of the house at night through a window with a six foot drop. Well. When I was 8 or 9, I was told to stay after school. I knew I would be in trouble at home if I were late and I told the teacher my father needed to be called. She said it was my problem. I asked to go to the bathroom. She let me and I snuck out of school and ran home. I destroyed letters I was supposed to deliver to my father from the teachers before that (only two days before) and had to stay after again. This time she said I was NOT going to the bathroom. However she left the room,  summoned by the principal and I was gone.

When the phone call came, I got the most horrifying belt beating you can imagine and sentenced to my bed for thirty days. I was to come home, do my homework on my bed, eat dinner on my bed and I could only leave my bed to go to school or the bathroom. I could have one stuffed toy. My father let me out of that punishment after a week. He didn't think I could handle the whole thing, but I never, ever did that again. I won't punish my son like that, but he is in a lot of trouble right now. The difference is I have a team of people to work with him and explain things and teach him. All the while he still gets disciplined. The point is, I had my behavior rough spots too. I had my ticks, my stims, and all the things I see in him today.

By the time I reached 6th grade, I had very few friends (there were 3 of us) and two of us were bully magnets. Before I went to Jr High (a total freaking nightmare) I was playing with kids 5 years younger than me. Just like my son prefers to play with kids either way younger or almost adults (sound familiar?). I didn't understand kids my age at all. It was a concern but not addressed very well, so continued. Those were the times. Now I'm hoping to keep him from being bullied like I was.

A painting I did for autism

Despite my life and all I went through, despite not having support for autism as kid; despite running away from home at 14; despite my random life that I will be sharing here soon; despite the fact that my medical health has gained deteriorating factors, I am still doing things. I still became a parent of four kids, I still have a part in their lives, I still held jobs, and now I'm still striving to do something, anything. I want kids with autism (who are unsure of their lives) and kids with bipolar or who are being bullied, to know that they can do something too. That is what Galaxy Zento stands as an example of.

You can do this too. You can take the accomplishments of your life and show them to your kids. Show them that it's not over until it's over and life has possibilities for them. Show them other people who do amazing things despite disability. It's not about being gainfully employed either, it's just about doing something that you can be good at. And that's a great start!

So thank you for sharing Galaxy Zento. I hope more of you will continue to "like" and follow the page. And when the first novel (The Chessmen) gets published, you'll hear about it first. Thank you!

Even I can stumble in autism parenting

My kiddo when he was doing homework

Raising a child with autism is a series of challenges. Parents get flustered and we are no exception. Yes, I've been an advocate for education on autism but that doesn't make me more than human or immune to stress and frustration.

It's easier to give advice on someone else's child because you can almost do it with a clearer head and a different point of view. But that's why we have a community isn't it? So let me bring up to date.

Last week my son was grounded from his DS games for three days because of lying. He accepted that up front but got up in the middle of the night and stole his DS back from our bedroom. For that, he lost it until the 1st of July (with a vacation right around the corner). I warned him if he did that again, he couldn't take his DS on vacation. We spent the day talking about it and doing what is right. That very night, he stole it again.

I hid the DS in a new place that truly confounded him. We woke up at 2 am with him in our closet looking for it.

To stop that behavior we removed the DS from the house, but a new situation came up. It was 10:30 or so at night and we were in the opposite end of the house watching television when I got a phone call. It was the stepfather of one of my son's friends (not keep in mind my son's 10 years old). My son was standing in his friend's driveway on the opposite side of the block from us. I couldn't believe it. I went straight to his room and sure enough, he wasn't there. He had climbed out his bedroom window and left. We didn't hear a thing and no one saw anything either. I went and picked him up.

How did he manage a window with a six foot drop? His bed was how he reached the window and pushed out the screen. My mountain bike was parked under the outside of the window and that's how he got down. He was lucky, way too lucky to describe. The following morning we went into protocol mode. Call the therapists office and report to his psych dr, get his counselor and a police officer to come over and talk to him about how dangerous it was for a child in his pajamas to run off at night.

He hasn't run off again, but he's still getting up at night and getting into mischief. He snuck his laptop into his room and has gotten candy. The candy is no big deal but we are worried for his safety so there are rounds of us playing guard duty. His bedroom has been completely rearranged so there's no more reaching that window. I need to be taking his shoes and sandals at night. And I've set up a table in the living room so I can be right in sight of him while working at my computer instead of being in the office.

We've already received lots of wonderful advice. Good friend Neil from facebook suggested that his DS may have become his special interest and therefore as powerful as a stim behavior for him. Taking it away makes him too unbalanced. I missed that thought and thank Neil for pointing it out. So a new schedule is under way. He's saying he needs more of us. He's not throwing violent tantrums or anything like that.

But even an advocate can get flustered and need advice. No one is perfect.

To all my Autism Friends and Family

Just because you have autism or a debilitating disorder, doesn't mean you can't leave your mark on this world.

I plan to be a living example of what I just wrote above this line and I'm asking for your support in doing so. NOT monetary support, so just put that out of your mind. I'm asking for moral support in another fashion that won't cost you a thing. I'm asking for a show of numbers. Let me explain.

As some of you know, I have moved on to another project called Galaxy Zento. It is my universe of heroes, villains, fantasy and sci fi and has it's own blog (linked to the name). This universe is how I survived some of my childhood.  I want you to remember that this is the work of a man with increasing health difficulties, disability (autism, brain injury and possibly MS or related). On top of that I want you to remember that this is a man not giving up. So let my example be your example. I want to share that with you.

You are the best of readers and I have enjoyed your support in my autism writings since I started in around 2008. The works of this blog will remain online until the internet ceases to exist (or blogspot does and I hope that never happens). We have shared so much in the world of autism. We've laughed and cried and my work has actually helped a few people here and there. I do hope it helped way more than that. So here is how you can help me with my project.

1: If you have been a "follower" of this blog, please do so on the Galaxy Zento blog too. Even if you never go back to it, it shows support. I really hope you do come back and enjoy the stories I'm writing there, but just the fact that followers show is wonderful and I will be grateful to you for that.

2: Share it! If you like what you read or know someone who likes to read online, share my work where ever you want to! So long as there is a link and I'm posted as the owner, you can even print and share (not sell).  Share anywhere you like and go, Facebook, Twitter, Reddit, Stumbleupon, whatever!

3: Comment! I would very much enjoy to see comments from anyone. You can post anonymously or sign in and your email will not be spammed (I've checked on that with Blogspot). I will not use your email for anything at all. I would just love to get the interaction. The items above are more important, but this would be very cool to see.

4: If you are on Facebook, come to the Galaxy Zento fan page and click LIKE. That will also NOT spam you and shows your support. Feel free to browse the more than 200 illustrations I have drawn so far (and more to come before I lose any more use of my hands). I hope you will visit there often too. The more "likes" the better. Naturally, as above, comments and all sorts of picture likes are very welcome!  And again, share the same way if you would. On the fanpage there will be updates to all sorts of things Galaxy Zento, that includes the book work and more art.

Now, if you want to, and you see something of my art that you really really like or want to show off Galaxy Zento in other ways, that's where you could make purchases if you want to. I do NOT expect you to. But it is available and I have done Autism art as well. The autism art and T-shirts are available on my CafePress page. Kids sizes are there too. If you want a mug or mouse pad compare prices with my DeviantArt page before you buy. I don't get much out of any sales. I get 2 bucks if you buy a mousepad at DeviantArt for example. But you could get something to show off and enjoy.

Sorry, no T-shirts on DeviantArt.  I will take Autism art requests and make them available!

 My stance will always be for autism education. Want to know who I think you should donate to on autism?   Easter Seals and your local Autism Society chapter, that's who.  If you are in another country and have a group that's helping your community (that's legally recognized and legitimate for taking donations) go with them.

So, what I'm asking to recap is for follows and likes on the blog and facebook and sharing. Commets and interaction would also be nice. So there you have it. I will be passing this around to my friends of autism on facebook and email and I hope you will consider it. Let my example be yours. And know that no one with autism is alone. You are not alone. Thanks and I hope you enjoy what you see!

Autism in the workplace

I'm going to use the term Asperger's for high functioning autism here because it's recognizable and familiar. I could say HFA too, but whatever. This is for those who are able to go out and seek employment. You know who you are.

This post is inspired by a comment a while back:

"I've got Asperger's syndrome and so will probably be re-diagnosed as now having mild autism. Since resources are limited, those with a supposedly less severe disability such as myself will likely lose what little support we are getting.

I've read many blogs on the subject and no-one seems to be discussing the fact that the needs of people across the autistic are so very different. Many people with Asperger's, myself included, are capable of living fully independent lives but need a lot of intensive and expensive support...especially in the area of employment"

First of all, we would do well to remember that our needs across all of us vary dramatically from one end of the spectrum to the other. That's why it's referred to as a spectrum. It's hard for us to do that sometimes because of our social blindness that trips us up so much. That same "social blindness" (as I call it- not a medical term) can really screw things up on the job.

Seeking employment with our conditions is a daunting task. Sometimes, as you try to explain yourself, (especially if you do it in an interview) you can almost see the interviewer rolling their eyes:

"Oh gawd, seriously?"

And you know you aren't getting that job. It's a nerve wracking experience to say the least.

So what do you do? Hide the fact that you have any condition? Sure, but then if things mess up somewhere and you try to explain it, you wind up with them either not believing you or penalizing you harder. I've had this happen personally. I've lost jobs because I thought I was following directions and they came around and said, "How could you do that!"  Employment is not such an easy world for those who have autism at any level. No, that doesn't speak for everyone. Some never have a problem, or at least don't look like it. Others with more difficulty wind up with unforgiving employers who have no patience.

And that's what we need, patience and often direct and literal instruction on the job. In todays financially stressed world, there aren't as many patient employers as there should be. So there are some things that we need to do the best we can.

1: Never give up looking for ways to be employed or self supporting.
2: Get career minded and seek schooling for what interests you most.
3: Seek out special programs in your area or state that may help you get training or work experience.

I know, not all of us can do this, and many will need help and guidance. That's why the rest of us advocates need to educate employers and bring this to the attention of our politicians and special programs. Employing someone with autism may take some adjustment and clear communication skills but there are rewards for doing so.

1: Detail oriented. We can be so detial oriented that, once we know our job, we don't vary. And we'll work hard to prove it.
2: Loyalty to company. Once we get into a company and work for them, we can be fiercely loyal to who we work for. We'll be ready to go to bat. We'll help with special projects (so long as we have clear instructions).
3: While not all of us can be awesome with the public (we'll sure try!) many of us can be awesome in behind the scenes project support that will knock your customer's socks off.

Now some final advice for you seeking employment. Something you need to ask yourself:

Are you responsible with your medical conditions? If not, that can and will get in the way of your employment opportunities.  For example, if you have bipolar disorder (severe enough to require medication) and you don't take your medication, you could have problems. It's one thing to be doing the best you can with what you have. It's another entirely to be irresponsible, commit crimes, drink, do drugs, or not take care of yourself. So, if you want to succeed here are a few things to remember:

1: Hygiene... go to work clean! Take showers, brush your teeth and hair, clean yourself and wear clean clothes. Use deodorant! Use soap! Do it everyday if you have bodily odor problems. As you get older you will find your body needs it more and more. Mine sure does!

2: Stay out of legal trouble! Don't get into illegal drugs, don't abuse any drugs, don't drink alcohol. Stay away from people who do these things.

3: Don't be lazy. Get out of bed in the morning, be on time or even five to ten minutes early. Keep to your schedule.

It is hard out there. We do need support. What's sad is that there are areas where we still don't get that support and my own story proves it. I think it's about time I actually share that story.

Shifting tics and drifting minds

This morning, the car needed gas. The poor thing had to be running on fumes as I took my wife to work. Unfortunately, as so often happens, my mind drifted off elsewhere and I drove right on by the gas station. I got all the way to her work and she handed me her bank card.

"What's this for?" I asked.

"To get the gas for the car."

Then it struck me what happened. I know what you're thinking; "Hey man, that happens all the time. It's normal."

Well I have two things to say to that:

1: It doesn't feel normal to me.
2: I could understand this and research shows it's normal to a point.

I hate it when my brain does its drift away thing. It can make it very hard to get where I'm going and finish what I'm doing. It makes me space off important things like current tasks, making dinner, making important phone calls and more.

I've taken the trash out to the can outside and wound up staring at the trash container, wondering why I was there. It may be normal at a certain point, but in my case, I find it terrifying. In any case, my next MRI will be of full spinal and brain so we can try to get a further look at what's going on. So far, concussion causes permanent brain damage cannot be ruled out and is highly likely. Even so, it wouldn't cause me to progressively get worse, so my doctors are concerned on that point.

Finally on me, for a long time there wasn't much of pain involved, but now there is. It's in my calves, knees, elbows, neck and back. The other night, my wife was rubbing the back of my hand gently with her fingers and I was surprised to find that this actually hurt. It felt like my hand was severely bruised, but nothing showed. Now it seems fine. I've experienced the same pain in my scalp on occassion now.

So what about the tics I mention? Well, that brings me to my son who's tics and stims have shifted. They will do that many times as he gets older. All we can do is try to help him work through them and concentrate on what's happening. Some say you can't stop your autistic child from stims or tics, but some have to be addressed. Like forcing a hacking cough that sounds like a cat gagging on a furball. He's developed some new obsessive traits as well that we are trying to help him with.

He's obsessed with the idea that his fingers stink and that he's stepped in something with his shoes. He stepped on a giant slug the other day that kind of sealed the deal for his feelings. Now he does strange tip-toed walks around the back yard that worry us. Maybe I need to step in something gross and handle it like it's no problem just to show him? We really aren't sure. I try to reassure him that something on the bottom of his shoe is why he wears shoes in the first place. I can see it will take consistent application. At times like this I have to remember that he's overcome worse, like being a "poopie picasso". When he was a toddler he would smear feces (it's a texture issue) and nothing tops that, absolutely nothing.

So we carry on and that's all for the update, for now.