I shouldn’t say never because it is narrowly possible that a Republican may come along proving to be a real leader and not just a businessman or politician and someone who actually gives a damn about the people enough to fight for real change in our country. I don’t see it happening in my lifetime but it is what it is. I also say everything here with full knowledge that plenty of you out there won’t care what I think. That’s just fine. Feel free to walk on by, because if you attack me, invariably prove me right. But if you want to know how you lost my vote, I’m going to spell it out here.
I’ve lived through some of what I recognize as Republican
cruelty and indifference by growing up in Nebraska, arguably one of the most
anal retentive excessive Republican states in the country. Lincoln is my
hometown. It’s a college town and also an immigration hub. Being that, it’s a
mess of racial intolerance in its base society. If you are colored, gay or just
a woman, you get shit on. If you are loaded, you’ll do just fine. If you are
white and find a steady job, you’ll be mostly fine. But Lincoln and Nebraska overall
don’t forgive you for not being what they prefer. Oh, and if you are mentally
ill or disabled, you’re screwed. You’re a pariah.
I suffered some pretty terrible misfortunes in Lincoln and
they started from my very childhood. The school system labelled me retarded and
I was forced to endure a lengthy hospital stay when I was 13. There was some
justice when I returned because the doctor in charge of my care collected all
my teachers together and some of the administration and called them the worst
excuses for educators he had ever seen. I was found in testing to be advanced,
but they allowed such severe bullying over my differences that there was no way
in hell I could ever be successful in their shitty school environment. A couple
of the teachers changed their ways toward me, but the rest hated me because
they got called out. Then we moved to Utah, where it started all over again
because not only was I still different, but I wasn’t Mormon. That’s a whole
different story. I came to understand that the whole system was run under a
very Republican belief system swim or drown.
I don’t know why my life kept bringing me back to hellhole
Nebraska, but I finally got a career there. But MS started to mess with me and I
was also diagnosed as bipolar/aspergers and that started to mess with that career.
I tried to get help but it was decided by a few certain people that I no longer
was worthy of that career. Those four people went out of their way to
investigate the deepest corners of my past, scrutinize every single solitary
action I took to do anything beyond wiping my ass and forced me into a position
where my Union rep said I needed to quit because I was dealing with sharks that
smelled blood. I tried to get legal recomp against them and even got a “right
to sue” letter from the Equal Opportunity Commission that was summarily ignored
by a judge and my case was thrown out. Their actions also moved into my public
life where I was harassed by police and neighbors. I was diagnosed with loss of
identity and psychological break down. It took me years to recover and I became
permanently disabled with MS though official diagnosis would come years later.
What’s the point of this? There was a time in the middle of it that I was
forced to accept welfare and the Republican system enacted a work program that
took away all benefits if you didn’t “go to work” where they told you. My wife
and I both were forced to work in a warehouse. I worked right next to a 74 year
old woman on permanent oxygen. Yeah, they didn’t care what her doctor had to
say, she needed to WORK. This program was not only cruel but was found unconstitutional
and shut down. Let me point out again, that this program didn’t care what your
medical conditions were, you would move heavy boxes of bottled water all day
because “work dammit!”. That was a Republican program, and they have always
been Republican programs.
I have finally left Nebraska and have family there that I
love, but I will never live there again. So I have a whole lifetime of
experiences with Republican run ideals that burned my life at every turn. I
suffered. But my story doesn’t end there. Now we see another aspect that made
me not only anti-Republican ideals, but anti-politics as well. Politics are destroying
our country with civil unrest but there are some comparisons that I have noted
that further push me away from ever going Republican. Here are some more ways
they lost me.
When Michelle Obama was called a man, they lost me. Who
stoops to shit like that? You get one guess.
When Michelle Obama was ridiculed for showing her arms, but
Melania Trumps nudes were found “tasteful” they lost me.
When they found ways to excuse “grab em by the pussy”, “I’d
do my daughter”, and “I walked right through that room of undressed teen girls
at that pageant because I can do that”, but now Biden is a creepy old man… they
lost me.
When they ridiculed a man for taking a knee in protest but men
armed with semi automatic rifles taking over capital buildings was okay, they lost
me.
When peaceful protestors were blamed for and condemned for
property damage but a 17 year old who crosses state lines, has a weapon illegally
due to age, and puts himself in a position to KILL two people is cheered as
some kind of folk hero, they lost me.
When the Proud Boys and other far right extremists got cheered
for running in the streets beating up black people and gay people with sticks
and bats, they lost me.
They also lost me when they ended head start for my son with
special needs and when the same school system put him in a corner and left him
there for the same needs.
Every time I see someone blaming all Dems or Libs for things
I know Republicans are at least doing “too”, they lose me again.
Don’t get me wrong. I hate our entire political system. When
I saw Nancy Pelosi tear up a speech behind Trump, I found it childish and stupid.
When I heard Biden tell a crowd to “clap you dumb bastards” I shook my head. I
know it isn’t just Republicans, but I see the level of hypocrisy and which way
it is really going. I see the unprecedented levels of Republican hatred and
delight in just being fucking cruel to everyone they can find. I see violence
by Republicans cheered while any infraction of
any kind by anyone else is condemned. I see a leader with a cult of
followers that I don’t even consider Republican because they are now something
far beyond that. I see a leader who is shunned by the rest of the world and who
could commit any level of atrocity and be cheered for it by his base.
If you are a Republican reading this and you don’t embrace
the ideals or behaviors I am condemning here, you are okay with me. At least
you see humans and humans. If you embrace
these ideals in any way, you can fuck right off. I don’t care if you never buy
my books or like my artwork or anything else. That is what this situation has
pushed me too and I’m not even going into the Pandemic on top of it.
So do you hate me now? Fine.
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